I started to dislike “sex and the city.” Yes, I admit it, I watched all the episodes, probably a couple of times already and I decided that it does not entertain me as much as depressing me.
The show not only makes me depressed when I see that three 30-something women—plus one that pushes fifty—still dress and act as if they were 20, and despite being smart and educated professionals, the only goal of their lives seem to get married to a “Mr. Big.” And unfortunately they are the female role models of our generation!
I used to love watching the show, I was living in Havana then, in a super sane relationship with a great guy, and boring Havana nights were brightened with couple of episodes of SATC in our bedroom, projected to our 18 feet tall walls. To me the show meant a lot, not for its content but what it made me remember: watching it every Sunday night with my girl friends in New York City, thinking—all of us—hope we won’t end up like these women!
I left Havana, where the concept of Sex and the city existed in a different way, people had (are having) sex all the time in Havana and do not make a big deal with whom, or where, or why. People cheat, fall in love, break up, but there are no complications. Cuban do not complicate their personal lives, but they are quiet dramatic! (you have to live there to understand that). And the idea of finding a Mr. Big only means one thing in Cuba, and that is not necessarily a rich/have it all/stud.
Life outside Havana, i.e Istanbul, New York, or like right now South Cone (Buenos Aires/Montevideo) changed since I left 4 years ago. I meet people, women mostly, and I recognize the talk, the attitude, the clothes. Almost all of them want to be Carries, or Charlottes…few Samanthas--of course now I meet more people who are married, with kids, or about to go that way comparing to 4 years ago-- Living their lives to be appreciated, physically, by men, receiving a diamond, accepting the “happily ever after”—as Orhan puts it.
Women, almost kill each other –and themselves—to be “loved.” They sacrifice everyday for a good fuck, or a perfect boyfriend, sometimes it does not matter. They sweat at gyms, get waxed, spend thousands of dollars in outfits, move around, cook, give birth, etc. all for men it seems, there are not a lot of us who do all that stuff just to be happy by ourselves.
Is it SATC’s fault to put it in our faces? No, for the skeptics at least, the show tell us the truth. If you are pretty enough, and know to finish a sentence, you are going to end up with a “Mr. Big” who sooner or later will enter your life and sweep your feet off the ground—and therefore we have to be ready for that moment, and try our best to be chosen as soon as possible, preferably before we hit 35.
Why there are not any tv shows that has a protogonist who is an unmarried/divorced 40 something professional woman, who is surrounded by younger/older men who do anything to be acknowledged by her? Maybe if we had these tv shows, the world would be a totally different place, as we all know that most of the children learn from tv not their families or schools.
I am fed up with going out with a mediocre jerk, listening to his stupid stories, or going out and being introduced to someone who could be “perfect” for me to be honest with you. I am also fed up with listening or telling stories about men, boyfriends, husbands, lovers, everytime there is a group of us (girls) doing something. (this is going to sound way to reactionary but why can’t we talk about global warming? A subject that is much more important than our vaginas. We can also talk about the pharmaceutical companies and how they control our health, the street kids in our corner (did we every pay them as much attention as how our asses look in jeans? I seriously doubt it).
I don’t want to be introduced to anymore overly arrogant dorks, or self-conscious geniuses, emotionally paralyzed hysterics, coming-out-of-age-mommy’s-little-latin-boys, sexually confused middle class kids!
I don’t want to give or be given advice either about how I should treat men so that they stick around, how skinny I should be so that they think I am beautiful, not talk too much so that they don’t feel “threatened by my intelligence” (I love this one)! I cannot stand this double standard, after so much that we have to endure, we also have to make sure they feel comfortable, instead of them learning how to have bigger balls, and take life as the was we do.
Maybe these perfect men do not exist because we do not demand as much as we should. Something to think about!
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